Cali's dilemma

[kristyjnh]

 Okay Cali, here's your second reading. This is by no means overwriting Rishi's reading (she did a wonderful job and a very insightful reading after all) but rather to be read in conjunction with the first. Because this is a big issue for you and you could certainly use clarity regarding it, I'm going ahead with this. 

So as you know (because it's the message you keep getting) you keep being told that love (I assume most readings say romantic love) is needed for you to grow and then told to be patient regarding love. But how can you grow if you're supposed to be patient and the cards already told you you needed love to grow! Let's see if we can't sort it out.


I was gonna use Linestrider but as I was typing the spread I got the feeling I should use Mermaids. So I went with my gut. I'll use Linestrider for any clarification.

Spread: Patience and Love? Patience or Love? Cali's dilemma. 

1. Why the message of patience?
2. How long must she be patient? Is there something she has to achieve before she can seek love out?
3. How will love help her grow?
4. Which parts of love are her readings telling her she needs?
5. Which parts of love are unnecessary or will get in the way of her growth?
6. & 7. How can she gain what she needs to break this loop?

1. Adrift - You've spent too long seeking, going out of your way to force things, that you have missed the path, the flow you are meant to be with. Surrender to the situation and let things lead you to where they -not you- wish to go. I know this card really goes along with the message of patience, but this has more of as aspect of fate, of the universe drawing you to where you need to go. 
2. Time out - Solitude and contemplation - hahhhhhh well. Lovely. Thanks cards. Okay. Take a step back, and examine what it is about love or a relationship that makes you want it so badly. Is it that you want a wife, suburban house and kids playing in the front lawn? Is it that you want someone to stay up all night with just talking about you uh, feelings? Are you horny and you just want to get it on? Are you looking for someone to take charge of you or your life so you can just fall in line? Look deeply at what you want and why you want it. Maybe you want all those things but one of them speaks a little louder to you than the others. Maybe what you really want from a relationship isn't there. Try to find that #1 thing for you and ask yourself, why? 
3. Endurance - Your path to love has been a long journey, fraught with setbacks and letdowns. And yet, you still try. You haven't given up. Perhaps this challenge is here to teach you just how formidable you really are. Maybe the lesson here is that you aren't a quitter, you aren't weak, you keep trying when the world goes against you. Is there anything else in your life that could have taught you this lesson?
4. Falling in Love - Well that's pretty self explanatory. The part where you give yourself whole-heartedly to someone else, letting go of the control you fought all your life to gain. Falling in love swallows you -YOU, Cali the baker, witch, pagan, lesbian, soul- and puts another person at the forefront of every thought, action, moment. This all-consuming fire is the thing the cards have been telling you you need. 
5. Reflections - I think this goes along with losing yourself in another person. The cards don't want you to stop and look at the relationship, or to look at who you are once you get to this point. 
6. & 7. Yearning & Atlantis + 6 of Wands --- I'm pretty sure these together are talking about being in a relationship with someone... Yearning- wanting someone, desiring them, tearing yourself up because you can't be close... coupled with Atlantis & 6oW which both more or less mean victory. So like, a successful longing?

 

So the overall takeaway I get from this is that only by totally releasing control and direction in your life will you find someone who becomes more important to you than your own life. Whew! That was an intense one!

 

So now I get a question... What about me needs to change?